


You're all I need

by star_lord_15



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Fluff, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Multi, Nightmares, Polyamory, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-25 16:33:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22499137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/star_lord_15/pseuds/star_lord_15
Summary: After waking up from a nightmare, Doyoung calls for his soulmates. The bad part is that it's 4 am and they don't want him. Yet, they do manage to have an actual conversation for the first time.or another soulmate au where people can communicate with their soulmate through thoughts.
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Nakamoto Yuta/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 3
Kudos: 98





	You're all I need

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back again with an au and I'm honestly really happy that I managed to write this on Doyoung's birthday, which is the reason why this is Doyoung centric. 
> 
> (sorry for the possible mistakes, but it's 3am and i want to sleep now)
> 
> 4.13.20 - i edited this a bit so i hope it's a better reading experience now ^^

"I need you" he whispered. "Whoever you are, I need you." 

No-one answered, but he knew they heard. They always hear him; sometimes they even respond. Not this time.

Doyoung was alone, curled up on his bed, pillow held close to his chest after waking up from another nightmare. He was calling, again and again, for anyone to be there for him, but there was none. Doyoung was alone.

He was aware the two had already met, they were together and Doyoung an useless addition to their life. They pushed him away every single time, and yet, Doyoung had never needed them more than he did in that moment. 

In their world, soulmates can communicate through telepathy. They can call out to each other and talk easily no matter the distance. Doyoung first tried reaching out to his soulmate when he was fifteen, right after he learned everything about the concept. What he never expected was to hear two voices in his head. Two people, both telling him he was wrong; both telling him they weren’t his soulmate.

With a broken heart and confused mind, Doyoung accepted the sad truth and stopped contacting them. At least, he tried to. He would unconsciously call out for them, wishing at least one of his soulmates were there for him, the feeling intensifying whenever he had a nightmare or an exceptionally bad day. 

The nightmares started two weeks after being told having two soulmates was impossible.The doctors all said something was wrong with Doyoung. Everyone called him broken.

He remembers that day well. He clearly recalls purposely reaching out to his 'soulmates', telling them about the diagnosis. He apologized and explained everything he had found out. Up to this day, it remained the only time they replied in a civil manner, no anger, disgust or dismissal directed at Doyoung. 

As the years passed, nightmares became a normal occurrence in his life. Doubt and loneliness slowly filled his mind, always wondering why the universe did not create someone to love him like everyone else. By the end of his studies he had already made peace with the idea that he was not made to be loved. It hurt him more than anything; the moment he realized. Painful sobs and desperate breaths would made a terrifying image to anyone, but there was no-one to see Doyoung.

After picking himself up and deciding to give up on the concept of soulmates, he tried dating, one-night stands, anything that could provide him with a certain amount of human affection, but nothing worked. No-one was willing to love him and so, Doyoung remained alone. 

He managed to make some friends who didn't find him weird though, people who didn't blame him for not having a soulmate or for his soulmates rejecting him. They tried to be there for him, to help him feel better. It worked to some extend. Doyoung had a decent life besides his soulmate tragedy.

With a stable job, a nice apartment and truly great friends, he had plenty of reasons to smile. He was only missing a romantic partner, someone he could grow old with. He was a romantic when he was a kid. Instead, he had two people who he thought would never be able to love him, who refused to acknowledge his existence. He wanted to stop believing in love.

Doyoung still remembers hearing them one day.On their eleventh anniversary, both completely forgetting about Doyoung's existence, they have directed their thoughts to their soulmate. Doyoung received them too. It was the hardest he had ever cried, desperately trying to not accidentally let them hear. He didn't want to ruin their happiness, especially since the two were the reason Doyoung couldn’t believe love was not real. They were real and they loved each other.

_"What_ _happened now_ _?"_

Doyoung was pulled out of his thoughts as he heard a reply in his head. The tone in which the words were spoken surprised him. They were slightly gentler, nothing like the way they would normally have.

_"Hello? You wanna tell us why you woke us up at four in the morning crying your eyes out?"_

Another person spoke this time, voice sleepy and just slightly annoyed, probably from the fact that he had been awaken at such hour.

"I'm sorry for waking you up. I'll be quiet, I promise. I'm sorry" Doyoung whispered out loud, needing a way to control the things he would send their way.

He wiped his tears and tried stopping his sobs, but it was hard, especially with his chest was aching as bad as it did.

 _"Dude, you've been crying for half an hour wondering why no-one loves you._ _Is that really true_ _?"_ the same guy asked, slightly confused.

"Everyone has a soulmate. I'm the only one who doesn't, so it's understandable nobody will ever love me" Doyoung's voice cracked slightly at the end, fresh tears falling from his eyes even as he tried to keep quiet "not romantically at least" he added a few seconds later.

 _"Maybe you can fill the lack of a soulmate another way? Maybe get a pet?"_ the first voice spoke. 

"I thought about it and was about to adopt a cat, but I have a fur allergy. Found out after I visited the shelter and ended up at the hospital."

 _"Oh come on..."_ the other one groaned " _how are you this unlucky?_ " he added, exasperation starting to be audible in his voice. 

_"Yuta! Don't be_ _an asshole_ _"_ first guy spoke again.

Yuta. That was the name of one of his not-soulmates. 

Doyoung almost sobbed at that. 

_"Oh shit, sorry, man"_ Yuta said, realization hitting him. Doyoung was aware that he didn’t mean to react that way, but it was four in the morning and the guy was obviously not happy to be awake. So Doyoung simply accepted it. 

"It's fine. You can be mean, I'm used to it from you two" Doyoung chuckled, wiping away the tears on his cheeks with the back of his hand

 _"What?"_ the other one asked, clearly confused.

"Well... it is the first time you two haven't snapped at me for reaching out. Besides that one time I told you about the diagnosis" he explained, starting to run a hand through his hair, a way to ground himself in reality and calm himself down.

 _"Shit, Johnny, were we really that insensitive?"_ Yuta asked, guilt dripping from his voice.

That was how he found the other’s name as well. Doyoung thought the two names sounded pretty together and for a second he thought about how his own name will never fit alongside them. Way to go to make himself even sadder.

"It's okay though. It was normal. I'm the broken one whose soul got lost in the end" Doyoung's voice was bitter, his fingers unconsciously tightening and slightly pulling on his hair. He wasn’t sure if it was an act of desperation or a way to punish himself.

A long silence followed and he guessed Johnny and Yuta realized they had made a mistake by replying to him so they decided to ignore him again. Doyoung's heart ached one more time, but he deemed it normal. He sniffled and closed his eyes, hugging his pillow tighter and hoping he would manage to sleep some more until his alarm was to go off. 

_"What's your name?"_ Yuta asked.

"Doyoung. Why?" he replied without opening his eyes or moving from his position. 

_"Do you live in Seoul?"_

"Yea"

 _"What's your ad_ _d_ _ress?"_ Doyoung's eyes opened and a deep frown found it’s place on his forehead.

"What? Why do you need that?" he asked, panic starting to creep it's way into his bones.

 _"We want to meet you"_ Johnny was the one who replied this time. 

"Why? So you can tell me to leave you alone again? Just tell me like this! I promise I'll try harder to never bother you again" Doyoung was panicking, new tears gathering in his eyes and threatening to spill.

 _"_ _Me and Johnny talked a bit just now and y_ _ou know how when people meet their soulmate, their soulmate marks appear as well?_ _We_ _don't have ours and we know for sure we're soulmates. We want to see if they will appear if we meet you_ _, even if everyone says it_ _’_ _s impossible_ _._ _It_ _’_ _s j_ _ust a theory, but we want to make sure_ _in case it_ _’_ _s just something that wasn_ _’_ _t discovered yet_ _"_ Yuta explained in a more gentle voice. 

_"Just if you're okay with it"_ Johnny added, reassuring and something in both their voices made Doyoung want to trust them.

"Okay" Doyoung ended up giving his address and waiting. 

Johnny and Yuta were on their was in seconds and it wasn't long until Doyoung heard the doorbell ring. He got up from his bed, wrapped the blanket around his body and went to open the door. 

He definitely wasn't expecting to be met with the two best-looking men he had ever seen in his life. Even in the dim light of his hallway, with puffy faces and barely awake eyes, they were breathtaking. Doyoung refused to think that he could have had any one of them as his real soulmate. He refused to cry in front of them. 

He let them in, being careful not to touch them, and guided them to the living room. 

"I'm Johnny" the taller of the two spoke first after they sat on the couch and Doyoung on an armchair at the side. 

"And I'm Yuta" the other spoke, a wide smile on his face, maybe to try to lighten the mood. Doyoung thought it wasn’t really effective.

"I... I'm Doyoung" he whispered, not really trusting his voice to be steady at the moment. 

"Should we get this over with? We can shake hands, I think that's enough for the soulmate mark to appear" Yuta spoke after a few awkward seconds, the smile on his face smaller, but still there.

Doyoung nodded and sat up, leaving his blanket on the armchair. He walked in front of the two and held his left hand out in front of Johnny. The other took it and, the moment they touched, the soulmate mark appeared on his left wrist. It was an ink black cherry blossom, soft and delicate. Their eyes widened and Doyoung slowly took back his hand to look at his own wrist. 

Nothing. 

He turned his attention to Yuta and held his right hand out for him. He took it and, just like it happened to Johnny, the soulmate mark appeared on his left wrist.The two were holding hands between them, reason why Doyoung used different hands for each male.

He looked at his wrists again. 

Nothing. 

He failed to realize his visioned blurring and tears starting to fall. He came through when Johnny called his name out in concern.

Doyoung wasn't okay. 

"I'm really broken, Johnny. I'm not your soulmate. I'm no-one's soulmate" he sobbed, sounding defeated. He took a few steps back until the back of his legs hit the armchair and sat down. Doyoung brought his knees to his chest and curled in on himself. 

The male knew he was probably making the two uncomfortable with his broken cries, but he couldn't stop. He always hoped he wasn’t really broken, but everything was there, the proof right in front of him. He touched them both. They both got their marks. Doyoung didn't. 

Silence fell between the three of them, Doyoung’s sobs being the only ones breaking it.

"Wait..." Yuta whispered, his brows furrowed in a thoughtful expression. "You need to touch your soulmate for the mark to appear, but Doyoung, you can hear both of us which could mean that you need to touch both of us for it to really appear" he spoke slowly, as if unsure of his words while looking between Doyoung and Johnny. 

"I already did. Nothing happened, you saw" Doyoung sobbed, mentally begging himself to stop crying. 

"At the same time I mean. We were holding hands the whole time which means that when we touched you, we were touching you and our soulmate. That would also explain why we never got our marks until now" Yuta explained further, more confident this time, sitting up and pulling Johnny with him.

They walked in front of Doyoung and Yuta was the first one to hold his hand out, followed by the other just a second later. Doyoung thought it was insane, impossible even, but he wanted to hope one last time so he held both of their hands. 

He expected nothing to happen so he closed his eyes and waited for them to tell him that his wrist remained empty. 

Doyoung only heard a gasp instead, coming from Yuta probably. It sounded like him. 

"Doyoung, I think you want to want to open your eyes now" Yuta spoke, still holding his hand, but turning it so his left wrist was facing up. 

He opened his eyes and there it was, his own soulmate mark in the form of a cherry blossom, identical to the ones decorating the wrists of the men in front of him. He pulled back his hands and stared at his wrist in disbelief until a heartbreaking sob ripped out of his chest. He covered his face with both his hands and tried, really tried to stop himself from crying, but all he could do was break down even further.

"Now what?" he asked the two, who were just looking at him, not knowing what to do or say. "Apparently I'm your soulmate in the end, but you don't want me. And now that I have the mark too, no-one will ever even look at me." Doyoung sniffled and looked up at them. Even though tears, they were still beautiful. He wondered what they really thought of him and how much they hated him now. 

"We don't hate you" came the reply from Johnny.

"Oh.. didn't mean for you to hear that" Doyoung whispered, lowering his head in embarrassment.

"And if you really want to know, you're beautiful too, Doyoung" Yuta spoke as well, a soft smile on his face. 

"You really don't have to lie to try to make me feel better. Both of you" he scoffed lightly as he wiped the tears with the back of his hand. 

"We're not" they said at the same time. It made Doyoung chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Yuta asked, a pout appearing on his lips. 

Cute.

"Your synchronization. It was cute" Doyoung smiled slightly as he was slowly calming down. "Still, I’m sorry about what I said. What happens to me from now on is not your responsibility. You have your marks now so I guess you two can go back to your lives. I'll manage" he said softly, deflated, his voice shaking a bit from all the crying he has been doing in the past couple of hours. 

The sun was starting to come out and gentle rays were coming though the windows, making the room a little brighter. One small ray fell on Doyoung’s wrist and he looked at it, smiling at how pretty the mark was. 

The only thing he could think about was that at least he wasn't as broken as everyone thought. He had a soulmate. Or two, apparently. Stories about people who didn't want their soulmate existed. Doyoung just had to accept that he was now part of that category.

"Can we... try?" Yuta asked, his hand having found it's way back into Johnny's. 

"What?" the frown on Doyoung's face was soft, not having understood the meaning behind Yuta’s words

"To love you. That, if you allow us" Johnny was the one to speak.

Doyoung's face fell. 

"What kind of joke are you two trying to pull off? Do you really hate me that much?" Doyoung sobbed again, already having lost count of how much he had since he woke up. "Are you really that cruel?" he whispered, his words shaking as well as his hands and chest, all due to the force he used trying to hold his noises in. He was sure he looked pathetic, yet he couldn't understand why they would try to hurt him like that. He couldn’t help but is he was really that despicable?

"Doyoung..." Yuta tried to speak, but was cut off by Doyoung.

"Please don't break me like that. Don't give me hope just to take it away. Please, I'm begging you, don't hurt me like that" Doyoung looked up at them, his eyes wide and full of tears, his cheeks shining with fresh and dried tears, his lips shaking. His hands were joined together as if he was praying, knuckles white from how hard he was squeezing them. He could feel his wrists hurting, but nothing could compare to the pain he felt in his heart.

Doyoung saw the exact moment the tears started to fall from the eyes of the two men in front of him, but Johnny was the first who moved. He reached for Doyoung's wrists, gently pulling him to his feet and wrapping him into a hug so tight the air was almost kicked out of his lungs. Yuta didn't stay still for long either, wrapping his own arms around Doyoung's middle and back-hugging him, burying his face in his shoulder. 

"I'm sorry... For hurting you, for snapping at you and for pushing you away for so long. I'm sorry for being such a bad soulmate to you and never giving you a chance" Johnny's words only made Doyoung cry harder, his face buried in the taller's sweater. It was oddly comforting.

"I'm sorry too, for hurting you so bad, Doyoung. Hearing what you said I just... I never thought... I..." Yuta tried to speak, but to no avail. Harsh sobs took over him and he cried harder, soaking Doyoung's lilac shirt. 

It took Doyoung a minute or two to calm himself down and to be able to find his voice again. 

"I forgive you. Both" it was small, but enough for them to heard. 

Johnny's breath hitched and Yuta froze completely behind him. They still had their arms tightly around him, even if Doyoung had made no move to try and reciprocate. His hands had remained at his sides, unable to move from the initial shock of being hugged. 

"You do?" Johnny whispered close to Doyoung's ear, his brows knitted together in a frown. 

Doyoung nodded and looked up at him "Yes, I forgive you" he repeated. 

"Why?" this time it was Yuta who asked, his voice smaller than Doyoung's. 

"Because I'm in no position to be mad. You guys didn't ask for another soulmate" with that being said, Doyoung tried to pull away from both of them. 

Once Doyoung was freed, he turned to face them both, but they weren't looking at him. Both Johnny and Yuta had their eyes glued to the floor and their shoulders hunched in guilt and shame. The sight made Doyoung's heart break again, remembering him of himself all those years ago, whenever he would have to tell anyone he had no soulmate. He never wanted anyone to feel the same way.

An idea struck him and he took a step towards Yuta, hugging him gently, as if careful not to break him. 

"Don't be like that. I said I forgive you so don't beat yourself up for it" he cupped the male's cheeks in his palms when he pulled back, gently wiping his tears away and sending him an encouraging smile. 

Doyoung pulled away only after Yuta gave him a small nod. He then turned to Johnny and gave him a soft hug as well. 

"That applies to you too. Don't beat yourself up for it" he whispered while wiping Johnny's tears away as well.

Doyoung backed off further when both males stopped crying, his lips still curved upwards in a kind smile and his eyes puffy.

"Doyoung... We were serious when we asked if we can try to love you" it was Yuta who spoke, but somehow, he heard Johnny whisper the same thing to him. And Doyoung noticed the honesty in them. 

He didn't know what to respond so he started nibbling on his bottom lip and playing with his fingers while thinking it over. He was quiet for a few minutes before he nodded. 

"Okay"

"Okay?" Johnny asked. 

"Yeah... b-but I think we should take it slow. We're still strangers, even if we're soulmates. And you two have been together for almost twelve years, it's gonna take a while before I get used to not being rejected and I’m not entirely comfortable with you two either" Doyoung explained, trying his best to wrap his head around everything.

Yuta's face lit up, his smile brighter than the sun itself. It made Doyoung want to smile and it seemed to have the same effect for the taller, as his whole face broke into a smile at the sight of his boyfriend. 

"Thank you, Doyoung."

The way Yuta spoke made him smile a little more and a little shyer. There was something about the way the two males were looking at him that made the blood rush to his cheeks. Their eyes held a fondness that he had never seen before. One that he never thought would be directed at him and it was safe to say that he was starting to get overwhelmed. 

He cleared his throat and looked at the two "Do you guys want some coffee and breakfast?"

The three ended up spending the day just talking and getting to know each other, at some point ending up cuddled on the couch under Doyoung's fuzzy blankets. The two insisted that Doyoung stay in the middle as he had a lot of catching up to do, to use Yuta’s exact words.

Over time, Doyoung learned everything there was to know about his two soulmates and after four months and countless dates, Johnny and Yuta had finally asked him to be their boyfriend. 

He agreed with the biggest smile on his face.

It was also when they kissed for the first time. They had decided in the beginning that they wouldn't kiss until they were all sure Doyoung was going to be part of the relationship, but that didn't mean there were no kisses on the cheek, forehead or nose. Doyoung had learned that Johnny gives the best forehead kisses and that Yuta adores giving and receiving nose kisses. 

Still, the first time Doyoung's lips touched Yuta's and Johnny's, he was done for. Yuta kissed him first, shy yet eager, his hands on Doyoung's cheeks as he allowed him to lead the kiss. It didn't last long and it wasn't deep, but it was perfect. Then Johnny kissed him; so different yet just as perfect. Johnny’s kiss was gentle and sweet, him leading Doyoung with a hand on the back on his neck and the other one on his cheek, caressing it with his thumb. It lasted as long as Yuta's, just a couple of seconds, but Doyoung's cheeks were red and his heart was beating fast enough that he could hear it in his ears. 

Once he calmed down, he asked them for more kisses and they spent the next couple of hours just kissing each other. Doyoung knew he found what he was missing next to the two. 

His nightmares remained though, even after months of being with his soulmates, but they were bearable. It was easier to calm down when Yuta and Johnny were at his door in fifteen minutes on the nights Doyoung spent alone.

It was after one particularly bad one that Johnny had asked Doyoung to move in with them, Yuta agreeing without a second though. And so did Doyoung. 

The three of them found an apartment big enough to fit all of them and also close to where they worked. 

Doyoung worked at a law firm, Johnny owned a coffee shop a couple of blocks away and Yuta was an art teacher in the same neighborhood. 

The nightmares disappeared only after two years of living together, when Doyoung knew for certain that he deserved all the love he received, all with the help of his two soulmates and his psychiatrist.

People even congratulated them when they found out they were all together. The doctors were confused, yet happy to have made a discovery. 

For the first time in his life, Doyoung was truly happy. He had everything he could ask for; he had a good job, a very nice home, some great friends and, most importantly, he had his soulmates who loved him and who he loved more than anything.

Doyoung was complete. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading^^
> 
> You can find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/purpleemango)


End file.
